I died, and I went to Heaven. You might say that I was
dreaming.
You could even say that I was Comatose and not cognizant of, or
capable of any kind of thought process. I suppose you could even
say that I was brain-dead. But I can tell you all about it. Yes
sir, I can, but whether you believe me or not would be the
question.
I have been told that dreams and visions are caused by
the kind of food you eat before you go to bed. But I wasn't just
asleep; I had committed suicide and very effectively I might
say. Suicide was against all the rules of all the Churches that
I had gone to. Suicide was against the entire Bible teaching
that I had been taught while I was growing up. Church and the
Bible says that those who commit Suicide get an immediate
straight to Hell card and would burn, and die over and over
again in the fire that burns forever and ever Amen. Who would
figure that even with all those warnings, I would say to Hell
with it anyway and deliberately try to go there?
Well, I suppose it must have been my Wonderful Church record or
the love of God that kept me from that fiery domain, because I
chose to risk all; and when all is said and done, I wish they
had not been able to bring me back from where I was. I did not
want to come back to the world we know and live in today as
Earth. No, I'm not crazy I just know where the angels live and
humanity dies. Would I do it again you ask? I have thought of
doing it again many times. But there are reasons for my
survival. I can see them now although that day was like seeing
through a glass darkly until Jesus showed me just how much he
did love each and every one of us. You might say I found
unconditional love because even though I had attempted to end my
life, Jesus said it wasn't my time yet. I still had work to do
on earth.
And as many reasons as there are for me to go back
there today, there are many more reasons for me to stay. What
possible reasons could there be for me to stay here a while
longer? I can tell you the reasons now, although I did not have
a clue before my advent to Heaven. The reasons for staying were
my Children and grandchildren, Future grandchildren and later
descendants who would be told of my unfortunate deed, Aunts,
Uncles, and extended family and Church members who are searching
for validity as to why we are here on earth every bit as much as
I was when I died. Life, as we know it here on Earth is
difficult with many health problems, Depression, Heartaches,
Divorces, love affairs, Bills, Credit card debt, Husbands,
Wives, Family problems, financial stresses, and Diseases along
the way. There are more reasons to go than to stay when faced
with Life's tumults and seasons of distress.
Many souls die prematurely, before their time, because they see
their lives as empty and meaningless. They cannot see their
future as beneficial to either them or their family, so they
choose the easier path of suicide. Therefore for them it is
easier to choose what they see as the easy way out, forfeiting
their lives and families to unseen spirits who are seducing them
by suggesting that they take matters into their own hands. These
"unseen Spirits" are unseen beings from Satan and their life
goal is to convince us that we are not loved and taking our life
is the only way to get even. The final conspiracy if you will.
These spirit voices heard only from within tells us that no one
would miss us and the World would be a better place without us.
Or hear the other lying spirit, 'the one that speaks with
unspoken thoughts that are really unseen spirits speaking in
your ears telling you." "I'll show them," I'll make your friends
and relatives pay by killing myself, and then imagine themselves
watching at their own funeral and crying over their own grave
unloved and unseen." There are many cases of suicides presenting
with the ungodly game of Russian roulette in which a bullet is
placed randomly in a gun and the trigger is pressed to the
forehead until the gun goes off. The subject, or teen-ager dies
and sorrow is the rule of the day.
These spirits are unseen, and although they are not of God they
certainly do exist and because they exist the unseen are allowed
to have their way with individuals, just like you and me. It is
causing countless hundreds of people young and old to end this
life by causing their own premature death and end their lives in
a cowardly way like suicide. Why, do you ask is suicide
cowardly? Because it is easier to jump out of life than to stay
in and fight the fight. Let me ask you "is it easier to pull the
trigger and die, or stay in this life and live it?" We all know
the answer to that question, it is harder to stay in this life
and live and take care of our responsibilities, than it is to
commit suicide.
If you fail in your suicide, or our modern
medical technology pulls you back, you could be damaged by your
failed attempts and be in a worse shape than before. Consider
the act of a young lady who thought she would die when she
jumped off of the Interstate Bridge thinking of death and fully
planning to die, but today she is not dead. Today, she is not
resting in her grave. Today, she is in a Nursing Home
permanently paralyzed from the neck down because she did not die
when she jumped from the bridge, but she might still wish she
had. She has had plenty of time now to consider her actions and
make amends for them.
She took no thought of anything but listened to lying spirits
who told her she would be better off dead. Thoughts of living or
surviving the fall wasn't part of the equation when she took her
supposedly last leap off of the bridge, Now she lies paralyzed,
her body is motionless and unable to move. She did not die, but
instead is now paralyzed and will never be as she once was in
life, for her body is now crippled, but her mind is clear. Clear
enough to wish for another chance at Life. That young lady has a
lot of time now to think about her actions and why she took such
drastic action. It could have been that she had broken up with
her boyfriend, or he had broken her heart, but believe me, there
was an alternative to suicide. She gets to see firsthand, the
tears of her parents who ask her why? And those of Siblings,
Aunts, Uncles, and Community members. If I could possibly help
some soul on the verge of suicide and show them the reason why
suicide does not work and show them a reason to survive then
this book is worth the effort.
By having taken that trip and by having gone through the great
divide, and seen that great Chasm between life and death and
being guided back through it by my Mother and Dad and other long
dead relatives and angels, I figure that my journey gives me a
right to say something about it. If I could pull souls feet "out
of hellfire" so to speak, and show them the alternatives to
suicide, then my story is worth the telling.
This is why I feel I must tell the story of my trip to another
place "this side of heaven." I would not trade my experience for
anything, but if I had it to do over again, I believe I would
think more clearly about my children and grandchildren, my
brothers and sisters, and the consequences of my actions. I
believe I was not allowed to succeed in my death because God has
a plan and I am a part of his plan. Like my mother told me, I
unequivocally had unfinished business here on Earth and I must
go back to complete it before I could be allowed to stay with my
parents in their garden of life.
Because of my active Church life and my mother's prayers, God
did not allow me to die, but instead sent me to my Mother and
Father on the "the other side of Heaven" where they are waiting
for me and my brothers and sisters to join them. They wait in a
garden of roses, and beautiful flowers, not unlike the one I
grew up in as a child in Southeast Missouri. How did I arrive
there? I am not sure. All I remember is that I was there.
Perhaps the angels placed me there while I was unconscious, but
I saw my Mom and Dad playing with my two brothers who had
crossed over when they were two years old and my older brother
who had also passed over before me. What a blessing that was to
see them all again and hold my brothers who I had never seen
close to my body. I will see them again, but I am no longer
anxious to see them before my time.
That is why my story is so important and why everyone needs to
read my story firsthand in case they are contemplating suicide
by gun, hanging, jumping, or some another method. I will tell
you this. There are plenty of people who are dying prematurely
through cancer, tumors, aids, or some disease that is taking
their life without their permission. These people who would
welcome another chance at life.
These people do not even consider wasting a precious moment of
their lives. They know the glory that awaits them and consider
it too precious to throw away. That is why we must get the word
out and help these souls who unwittingly listen to "unseen
spirits" whose only job is to seek to kill and destroy those who
listen to them.
Dear souls, heed not the lying words of unseen spirits who
advise you to take your life and ask Jesus to protect you from
wicked and irresponsible thoughts. Think instead about holding
your newest loved ones in your arms, future children, or ask how
you can bless someone else. Do anything but listen, to those
voices telling you life is not worth living. Because until you
lose your life, you will not value your purpose in life. You
will be glad you did not listen to them when life events are
played out. Trauma and depression are so very temporary, while
suicide and its consequences are so very permanent. Let us
embrace tomorrow and the life it brings.
About the Author:
Marie Headd Currently lives in beautiful Southern Illinois and
takes care of her grandchildren part-time.
